Sunday, October 19, 2014

VIDEO! DIY: Tina Belcher Costume

Hello, friend! 

A couple weeks ago I published a post with a DIY for my Lumpy Space Princess costume and my plans for my Tina Belcher costume.

Well I have the full Tina costume now and decided to show you in a video! How handy dandy!

So without any further ado, how to dress up as my spirit animal, Tina Belcher:

Hope you enjoyed!

I had a ton of fun making this and I think I might make more videos in the future. What do you think?

Sunday, October 12, 2014

Grapes and Mixed Signals

A few years ago, I developed a theory about grapes. 

This is the theory: Grapes are basically tiny watermelons.

#so #fresh
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A wild watermelon in its natural habitat.
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Now before you disagree and form rebuttals and get down in that comments section to prove how wrong I am, check out this Venn Diagram I made: 
(image via me)


Anyway, grapes are pretty great. Watermelons are also pretty great. However, this post is just about grapes. And mixed signals. But we'll get to that in a lil bit.

I don't think I've ever met another human that did not love or at least just enjoy eating grapes. Kids, adults, teens, the elderly. Everyone loves grapes. Including Grandma. Along with mangoes, plums, and apples, grapes are in Grandma's top five fruits that she buys on a regular basis. The other fruit in that list is pineapple. Why didn't I include it in that first listing? I don't know. Let's move on.

A little over a month ago, the school year had just begun and Grandma bought some grapes. For some reason, she seemed to think that I was not eating them. Even though I was. I love grapes. Why would I not eat them? I would be denying myself of the simple but delicious pleasure of eating one of my top five favorite fruits. I explained this to her. Still, she reminded me every day until we finished that darned bag that they existed. This also led to some mixed messages from Grandma.

One night I was about to go to bed...
(image via my twitter profile)
 I told her "no thank you" and that I was going to bed.

(image via my twitter profile)

(image via my twitter profile)
She was telling me some story that I can't remember now, but I had questions and started asking them. After a few answers, she suddenly was concerned that I was not sleeping and told me to go to sleep. Again. I don't think Grandma realizes that sleeping is one of my favorite things and I don't really need demands to do so.

The next day as we are in the car and pulling out of the garage to go to Cache Creek...
(image via my twitter profile)
She put the car in park and I got out and grabbed a bag of grapes.
(image via my twitter profile)
Neither of us ate the grapes. 

We brought them home the next day and stuck them in the fridge. Then I ate them for dessert. Then Grandma asked me why I was eating the grapes. She wanted me to eat ice cream instead. 

What did we learn today?

Sometimes Grandma sends mixed signals about what exactly she wants me to do. I try to figure it out to make her happy. 

Sometimes it doesn't work out. 

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Halloween Costumes (and DIY!)

Happy October! It's Halloween time! Yippee!

Some pumpkins I carved last year.
(image via me)
Another pumpkin I carved last year.
(image via me)
Besides the fact that October is the hottest month in San Francisco, October is my favorite month. I hate sweating, but I love Halloween! You get to dress up, eat candy, put yummy spices in your drinks and baked goods, and put up the best decorations! Halloween has the best decorations out of all of the holidays, in my opinion. Skulls and pumpkins and The Nightmare Before Christmas and zombies and witches and cobwebs! Nothing gets me in the spooky spirit more than walking through a web of stretched out cotton fibers.

I also love Halloween crafting and DIY. My Spooky Halloween Pinterest board is updated year-round. 

Speaking of DIY... This post is going to teach you how to DIY two different costumes: Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time (my costume last year) and Tina Belcher from Bob's Burgers (my costume this year)

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Adventure Time is an amazing show. I fell in love during the Summer of 2013 and never looked back.
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It's a cartoon about Jake the Dog and Finn the Human (the last of their species) and their adventures in the post-apocalyptic, mystical Land of Ooo. Pretty great. They actually explore some deep and progressive topics such as feminism, gender neutrality, and love. Of course there are also a few episodes that are mainly about the trippy weirdness of Ooo, but the show is a great source of hope for future generations in terms of gender roles and society. 

There are even gender swap episodes!
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My favorite character on the show is Lumpy Space Princess, voiced by the show's creator, Pendleton Ward. Yes, a man. It's the best. LSP is a valley-girl cloud/blob/lump of lumps that is constantly fighting an inner battle between trying to make her lumps look attractive for boys and learning that the "hottest lumps" are "on the inside." She is also a very beautiful shade of light lavender purple, my favorite color.

DIY yourself a lumpin' awesome LSP costume:

  • purple tulle (I think I used 3 yards of 54-inch tulle...)
  • purple dress (preferably strapless)
  • purple wig
  • hot glue gun and sticks
  • scissors
  • yellow paper or plastic (I used a piece of a Forever21 bag)
  • purple shoes (not necessary, but a nice touch)
Where to get the stuff and prices:
Amazon - $4.99
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Amazon - $14.59
(image via shipping email)

Jo-Ann Fabric and Craft Store - approx. $3.36
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I already owned the glue gun, glue sticks, scissors, yellow plastic, and shoes. 

  1. Heat up hot glue gun.
  2. Lay dress on flat surface.
  3. Cut tulle into foot-long pieces. This is optional, but will make the tulle much more manageable to work with.
  4. Once the glue is hot, dot a few dots onto the top of the dress.
  5. Lump and bunch up the tulle on the glue dots. 
  6. Repeat for the whole top of the dress.
  7. Dot glue under the first row.
  8. Bunch the second row of tulle lumps so they overlap the visible glue dots from the first row. Basically, you want to make sure the tulle is lumpy enough that it becomes almost opaque enough to not see the glue underneath.
  9. Repeat this for the whole front.
  10. Wait for glue to cool and harden.
  11. Flip dress over.
  12. Repeat steps 5 through 10.
  13. Check the sides of the dress and fill in any empty spots.
  14. Add any remaining tulle to random spots on the dress. This will make the lumps less uniform and the whole costume more overall lumpy. 
  15. Wait for glue to cool and harden.
  16. Cut out a star from yellow paper or plastic. I used a piece of a yellow Forever21 bag.
  17. Put on your lumps!
  18. Flop on your wig!
  19. Stick the star on your bumpy bangs!
  20. Slip on your shoes!
  21. Slap on some purple lipstick!
  22. Get sassy and a lil bit of a bad attitude!
Oh, my glob! You look like, so lumpin' hot!

This year, I am going to dress-up as Tina Belcher from Bob's Burgers. 
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This show is just everything to me. Everything. It's freaking hilarious, the animation is really cool, the voice acting is phenomenal, and THE PUNS. I also love running gags and this show's got 'em.

Now, Tina. Tina is my spirit animal. I connect with her on a spiritual level. She loves boys and butts, she is a "strong, smart, sensual woman," she writes erotic friend fiction, and her catch phrase is "uuuuuuuuhhhhh." She's also incredibly awkward and often anxious, but fights through her faults to try to get what she wants. When it doesn't work out (most of the time), she's okay with it. She knows who she is and doesn't apologize. What's not to love?

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I also just remembered that like LSP, Tina is voiced by a man. Interesting. As a young woman with a pretty deep voice, I guess I relate to these characters more than I thought.

(Fun fact: My voice has been mistaken as a man's on numerous occasions at the Taco Bell drive-thru in my hometown. "You're total is $4.37, sir. Please pull to the window." Then I pull up with a bow in my hair and lipstick on my teeth and the employee looks confused.)

The rest of the Belcher family ain't bad either. Bob tries to balance his passion for cuisine with keeping the restaurant in business and loving/dealing with his quirky family. Linda's greatest fault is her undying optimism and support for her husband and kids. Gene is the weird lil brother I've always wanted. And Louise. Oh, Louise. Constantly angry and yelling about it. Or causing trouble. Or plotting revenge. Or slapping boys. But also yelling. Always yelling.

Back to Tina. Tina's look is pretty simple. AKA a great character to dress-up as, especially when you live across the Bay with Grandma and all of the Halloween events you will be attending are in San Francisco. I would not want to carry the LSP costume with me on that trek.

The parts to the Tina costume are:
  • yellow barrette
  • Buddy Holly glasses
  • light blue t-shirt
  • dark blue skirt
  • knee-high tube socks
  • black Converse Chucks

I've already got the barrette, skirt, and awkwardness towards humans of the male variety. I'm halfway there! Also, my go-to dark blue Chucks are falling apart (I've had them since like, 9th grade. Seriously. Converse are amazing. This is not a sponsored post. However, I would definitely not be opposed to being sponsored by Converse. Hey, Converse! Hey! Alright, time to get out of these parentheses. Do you even remember what I was talking about?), so buying Tina's pair is actually doable and necessary.

So now you know how to dress up as LSP and Tina. Or a cloud and a nerdy teen girl. Or cotton candy and a nerdy teen girl. Or a loofa and a nerdy teen girl. Do with the information as you wish.

Do you know what you're dressing up as this year? Leave it in the comments! I wanna know!

Happy Halloween!